Gunfleet Boating Club News Letter-

December 2004/ January 2005  

(Just a short one)  

Hoping you all had a Good Christmas and wishing you and your family a Happy New Year for 2005 from all at the Gunfleet.

The Children’s party went well even though the real Santa was unable to attend due to illness. I’m sure that he must have recovered enough to do his job on Christmas Eve because I got my prezzies, lets hope he has fully re-covered now. There was a vicious rumour that the stand-in Santa didn’t need any costume padding and was of Welsh origin. The committee are looking in to this with a dim view and will publish there findings shortly. Thanks to every body that helped with this event, not forgetting the Karaoke King himself, Eyebrow less Nick Chatten.

New Years Eve was a great success. Thanks goes out to me for doing the shopping trip to Iceland (bargain hunter of the year, but there again there was only 1 day left in 2004). Special thanks to Nicky, Val, Val’s Mum, Paul and Kath for cooking the aforementioned. Sorry if I’ve left anybody out. Thanks also to DJ Sean (Who was Empero Rosco) Brown for the Music and Lights that helped us party the Old Year out and The New Year in. Thanks once again to Kath for running the bar and to me and Coddy for tidying the club up the following morning. Whose idea was it to have party poppers anyway?????

Congratulation to Trevor and Nicky Smith for all the hard work they put in raising money for a very good cause. They send there thanks to all who contributed, helping them to raise double the amount they initially thought. Well done to both Nicky and Trevor for this.

And, something I found in an old E-MAIL: -

Never let it be said that engineers lack a sense of humour.

 Here are some actual logged maintenance complaints by QANTAS pilots
 and the corrective action recorded by mechanics. By the way
 Qantas is the only major airline that has never had a major accident.

 P stands for the problem the pilots entered in the log,
 and S stands for the corrective action taken by the mechanics.

 P: Left inside main tire almost needs replacement.
 S: Almost replaced left inside main tire.

 P: Test flight OK, except autoland very rough.
 S: Autoland not installed on this aircraft.

 P: Something loose in cockpit.
 S: Something tightened in cockpit.

P: Dead bugs on windshield.
S: Live bugs on back order.

 P: Autopilot in altitude-hold mode produces a 200-fpm descent.
 S: Cannot reproduce problem on ground.

 P: Evidence of leak on right main landing gear.
 S: Evidence removed.

 P: DME volume unbelievably loud.
 S: DME volume set to more believable level.

 P: Friction locks cause throttle levers to stick.
 S: That's what they're there for!

 P: IFF inoperative.

 S: IFF always inoperative in OFF mode.

 P: Suspected crack in windscreen.
 S: Suspect you're right.

 P: Number 3 engine missing. (note: this was for a piston-engined
airplane; ( the pilot meant the engine was not running smoothly)
 S: Engine found on right wing after brief search.

P: Aircraft handles funny.

S: Aircraft warned to straighten up, fly right, and be serious.

P: Radar hums.

S: Reprogrammed radar with words.

P: Mouse in cockpit.
S: Cat installed

Jon (Golf’s as bad as my skiing) Moss

If you are on E-Mail and wish to receive further newsletters via that media, please mail me at jmoss.moss@virgin.net. Also the web site can be found at www.gunfleetboatingclub.co.uk